final

heyaaaa~~~

so....how ya doin?hahha
sebulan yang penuh dugaan dan rintangan dah lepas
and tinggal nak final la pulak =..=
know what..ermmm..I kinda can slow my addictive toward k thingy
and dont know why and how..but it just happened.
idk I should be happy or not..but its sure relief thing.
and I hope its permenant
coz I...really want to slow a little bit.and bit..and gone.

neway..smile always =D

sweet

home sweet home baybehhh...♥♥♥

and sooo....happy birthday awak..
ok im late 100 years than everyone..
but yeahh..I like you till now coz you are so kind
to the point that I think that you r not a human
you know that you somehow teach me how to be patience with everything
be kind to everyone

=)

azam baru

》》 #np - lurk

Assalamualaikum =D

okaiii.. September sudah jejak

how's your preparation rohani jiwa raga ? untuk pukul 4 rata semester baru ni ??

harap harap bukanlah angan angan di awal sem saja kan ? kan ?

ha ha ha

kau pon sama ja nasss..kah3

so... lusa dah nak start kelas..

sem baru

azam still sama....capai azam yang tak sempat nk capai dulu, insya Allah

sem baru..cari ilmu banyak2 nas

sementara ada masa nk gali ilmu banyak2

bukan ilmu duniawi ja..

akhrawi pon.. 

o..ke ?

Ya Allah...jauhilah aku dari penyakit malas dan lemah.

=)

credit to the owner

scared

assalamualaikum =)

so...how to start

I know...I've done something that I shouldn't do
now..look..what have you done????
you bagi harapan kat orang
I was just thought that person as a friend
nothing more.nothing less
I just hope what I'd think was not true
I just hope that was just my false assumption. .

urghh..

tu la.... Allah kata jaga ikhtilat
kau xjaga

just a smiley can make people falling
bila falling, we can't promise that our heart still with our Creator. .no?
but at least now we had stop interaction with each other..credit for someone's explanation about ikhtilat ^^
im just glad that person can understand and  agreed to stop our converst right away.

saya tak memilih, but I've ask HIM to give me petunjuk
idk its work or not...I dont see anything but my instinct tell me to say no..hmmm
hope that is my right decision..
if we are destiny t

o be together, somehow after you comeback we will still be together. 

sesungguhnya Allah maha mengetahui apa yang kamu tidak tahu =)

take care of you

"Asyik aku je jaga hati orang, hati aku sape nak jaga."

Takpelah kita selalu jaga hati orang sebab menyakiti bukan sifat Rasulullah SAW.

hati manusia memang susah nak dijaga
kadang2 kita tersalah cakap
kadang2 kita tersentap

bila tersentap mula la nk buat ayat sentap2
sungguh xcool nas..xcool...
bila sentap dia rasa marah..bila marah dia ckp ikot kepala lutut ja
nampak dak permainan kat situ ???

kadang2 aku xleh kawal perangai sentap2 ni
hati wanita sangat sensitip..cewaahhh!
kadang2 aku boleh bersabar dan take it as a joke or wtv
kadang2 aku xboleh, which is kalau aku tengah bersabar dgn 1 perkara, tba2 datang 1 perkara..dan... BOOM KEBABOMM!!

maka...

keluarlah ayat tersentap...

jadi....

jagalah hati org lain,
hati kita x terjaga tak pa
kita jaga sendiri..
buat terapi sendiri ka apa

OK?

lepas ni aku cuba untuk xbuat ayat sentap dah...

sabar lah wahai hati.... =D

jalan yang lurus

haippp!!

Tajuk yang sangat cliche
ha ha ha..suka hati aku la..hehhh

so......I like this one person
I do like him...before and even right now, I really2 like him, its suffocating me, really
but, now, im trying to reduce that, with back to my creator
its hard to reduce dose that u need everyday..

I know, I've been slacking these past years...
hidup dengan bahagia dunia, xpenah pikir dengan sang pencipta
dalam hati xpenah nk letak sang pencipta no 1..

I tell you, aku bukan sekolah di persekitaran yang boleh buat aku terbabas, tapi betapa ruginya bila dpat sekolah macam tu tapi sia2 kan ilmu yang ada.sia2 kan peluang yang ada

at the end, aku terjun into dunia yang buat aku lupa diri..
lupa kenapa ak hidup atas dunia ni..aku rasa aku sangat bodoh...bodoh sebab xistiqamah dengan apa yg aku buat kat sekolah tu, xpraktik apa yg aku belajar kat situ..
at the end, aku buat benda yang ak xpatot buat...bukan nak salahkan kawan sebab pengaruh aku, tp salah sendiri, sebab x kawal diri
now bila dah terjerumus dngan dunia tu, ssh nk keluar
bukan tak boleh suka dgn benda tu, tp kalau dah hari2 dengar benda tu, hari2 dok dreamy pasal org yang of coz sampai bila2 pon xdapat, apa benda? mana sempat nk fikir dengan DIA..sempat kah? sempat?

Tak...

dulu...aku cakap suka benda tu sebab dorang nk sampai peringkat tu, kna berusaha,  baru berjaya..yes...
memang pon....memang aku ambil semangat tu, nak berjaya kena berusaha
tapi tu sebenarnya side point sahaja...suka sebab depa hensem,suka sbb depa baik,suka sbb depa caring..pffttt..of coz...semua2 tu ciri2 lelaki pilihan..,KONONnya...
bila jadi macam tu, hati dah ada kat mana? dok tang len dah kan?

dah xpikir dah...ALLAH tu lagi caring..DIA kan yang maha pengasih dan maha penyayang? xcaring lagi ka tu? aku xtau la aku nak jadi apa

I'm glad I've found this anon's blog, ayat dia perghhhh...sentap...mmg berasid gila...makan dalam wehh.padahal ayat biasa2 ja..tp isi tu mmg kena gedebuk mcm bata jatuh atas kepala
that blogger adalah medium untuk aku berasa untuk balik.. tapi Allah yang tunjuk jalan kat aku suruh sedar

aku cuba...ak berubah
sikit..sikit

tolong aku...tolong aku untuk balik ke jalan yang lurus

pss:: tau benda apa yang aku suka tu? KPOP..sapa baru nak addict, habaq awai2, xpayah, benda makan diri, macam aku.
takat suka nk dengaq lagu2 tu xpa la kot..kalau nk minat dgn org2 sekali,macam aku, sila tanam masuk tanah ja benda tu, sungguh..xdak pekdah

because of that, you will do things yang Allah memang larang..
bayangkan..kalau dorang datang malaysia, ada concert, ada fanmeeting, ada hi5 bagai
itu....tak rasa ka mcm dah mmg lari konsep nk jadi muslimin muslimah yg berjaya?

fanmeeting..hi5...jumpa dengan artis, konon nk mintak sign, tapi satgi pi salam..p peluk..untuk perempuan, sah2 dah haram kan? ajnabi..mmg xleh sentuh..I'm really glad that im not terjerumus dgn benda2 tu lagi.

ini adalah hasil minat aku dgn benda tu selama 4 tahun...so I know how that things work..even xpenah p lagi event2 macam tu.

o...ke......panjang nok entry aku kali ni

hope things work...tak apa...Allah kan ada bersama aku...

Assalamualaikum =D

credit to the owner

eid mubarak

ayoooo...
happy eid mubarak to all muslim in the world ♥♥♥

fasting

heyaaa~~~

Sooo...happy fasting to everyone ? especially to all Muslim around the world
But....its kinda sad this year..
Because our brothers and sisters at Gaza are fighting and and..
Getting killed..by...you-know-who...I don't want to say that name
I...just can sit and stare at those who were died..kids were dragged..women and elders were killed..
I just wish.. I could help them
What can I do right now is just dua', pray for them..
Moga Allah tempatkan mereka  dikalangan orang2 yang beriman... 

:'(

Judge

>> #np blackbird

People seriously need to stop from judging others before they know them..

Its happened to you doesn't mean they do the same even the situation are the same..analyze before you judge

^,,^

Weird

Heya bloggie

Emm..well well...I know this will coming..but they were too 'young' for this
I mean..yeah..they were just like 2 years old since debut
And i know..soon they will be dating n bla bla
But with all wyf ge's thing..and now...baekhyun???
These were toooo soon.

Actually I dont mind with baek dating with whoever he want
And honestly I dont mind if bunny also dating with someone
Seriously...after pakcik..I really dont mind because the fact is they were just a human
That time I was just not matured enuff to think that

what the purpose of being  their fans?because of their music? Or hoping to be their lover? Or because of their face?
Maybe those who leave fandom said not because of delu.because they were tired.tired because of their idol is dating

Hahh ha..dont you think its the same..they were dating forever or not they were just a human.can you just support them?

They said that 'you are they only one ' if they dont said that, you say that they were cold
'I love you' that because they were grateful with your support.
Can't you see the meaning of those word? stop being delu
I know...before...I was just like that....after years become a fan..
I know how its work

Dont say that they cheat..or you're being cheated..because they made some handgesture as secret code or wtv
Leave that alone..they can do wtv they want
Cant you see that?

I dont want to act I am the best or whatsoever
But im telling the truth.. those are REALITY

=)

my fault

>> tenung screen

hey.... emmm..how should I say

I'll be the next damn girl ?? LOL

masa sekolah rendah dulu aku pon macam tu..

jeles sbb kwn ak asik bkepit dgn kwn lg sorang

I used to always merajuking

tp lepas masuk form 1.. I think

"ahh...I shouldn't be like that, people have their freedom to friend with"

and like that, I tried to accept everything even its hard at first 

and now I use to friend with everyone

with my friend's friend, my friend's roomate..and bla bla

and after today....maybe I should be more careful

I should think people's view too

that person always tell me about that 'damn' girl

how she annoyed her by tweeting with her fav unni about fav band and bla bla

but I didn't know that my action will make her feel like she feel towards that girl

but its not that I'm start that conversation

I know that unni like them too..but I like them too

it is a sin to spazz about them?

and I don't plan to attract that unni pon...

she's the one who start first

I'm not blaming that unni

but I blame myself coz I didn't aware bout my surrounding

hmmm

Dissapear

>> #np dissapear /anberlin/

I cry cry cry... but without tears
It's hard to accept, but I need to move on

reality bites, tsskkk

life as a fan is so hard
I didn't see this will coming.. at least not so soon
everything happened was too fast, still can't cope with it
but I know..this is the ending
we can't see some random moves or talk from galaxy hyung anymore
and I hate that fact. sob3 T____T

“You never miss the water 'til the well runs dry"

True..

you never miss the star 'til the galaxy is gone

i know he is not my top bias /talking about being a fangirl/

but I love them as OT12

so...when, 1 down

its feel so heartache =(

wu yifan ge, I hope you will live well after this..don't worry, I'll still support the minor. I'll support both of you guys.

Live well or live hell::you already choose gege. Im glad for that =)

nightmare

>> #np shadow of the day

please say that all of this sh*t thing was not true

its affected me so much

its show that i love them so much

because i am crying right now

i cant leave them

but i cant face them if that thing is happening

and i am not ready

not ready for everything

someone please say something

please say that its not true !
i'm begging

TT_________TT

exposed

>> #np waiting for the end

Hey~~

Ermmm.. thanks to that unnie, she'd tweet a link 

a link that make me...hmmm...got speechless for awhile

i...don't know whether i should trust that source or not

but...hmm...seem like its legit...maybe ??

.......................

ahh...maybe i should take my lunch now

ahhha... hmmm....maybe...

I......
to someone....just be happy =)

its just a crack..I still can fix it =D

I know consequences for being a fan..im not delu

If its true...then im happy for you..seriously ^^

Dwell

>> #np angel

Hey dear,

Already 2 in the morninggggg

but here I am....still staring at my notebook's screennnn

Tomorrow have to record presentation for one of the subject

Day after tomorrow, BAKSIS.. one of my Ko-k subject =,=

so..leave that alone

urmm...how should I say

I'm scared with my own feeling ?

I'm scared that I can't fall for someone else

I'm scared that I could not afford to fall in love

I've tried for numerous times, try to act like normal people do

but I can't... why???

why ?

why ?

because of him

because he is too kind

he is too precious

I know... I.. FOREVER can't have him

I know that

but he like...holding something inside me

that I can't afford to let it go

I know, I am being crazy at 2 in the morning

but that is the biggest things that dwell inside me right now

I'm scared

it is okay ?? me...acting like this ???
i mean, can't afford to let him go ???

feel like crying right now

i seem can't differentiate between reality and fantasy..sheesh 

strength.may

>> #np growl

Hey Uncle~~

Its May...already May

just how fast time had been passed

Today I am really tired

TIRED.EXHAUSTED

sleepless this past fortnight

and this week already reach the peak

till my body can't cooperate with me anymore

sick before going to the camp is NOT  good 

seriously...

this coming Friday I'll be going to not a camp actually

but some sort of adopted families programme

but really...my throat was sore and having migrain

and I still have tons of works to finish before end of this day

because today is my only day that I didn't have class

but....

I need to go out for s/thing that I should not do but I was forced to do it

*sigh*

its not like I don't want to do it. But everyone should help me

coz not only them were busy as sh*t

sleepless because of doing this sheesh

now im sick...good

im trying not to whine, but i'm tired...really tired T____T

i'm trying =(

go ! nas go !

you can do it !

smile =)

>> doing nothing and waiting for my friend

smiling  makes you more positives =D

one

two

THREE

there...keep smiling ! ^^

deja vu

>>> feeling nervous

Dear inchi bloggeu

today i've to do assessment which is similar doing tocie

mean i need to talk on the spot... in ENGLISH !!

OMG ! my nerve seem cannot be in good term /crying~~~/

i can type...

but i can't speak fluently because of my surrounding people talking in my own language

ottokhe~~what to do

i seem cannot sit properly right now *sigh*

oke leave that thing alone

deja vu: things that had happened before this

my gummy seem to get swolen since last 2 days until now T___T

this situation similar after i've got surgery to remove my wisdom tooth last year

i can't eat something hard, which i need to eat porridge everyday for 2 WEEKs !

today also, i can't eat rice or something hard *crying~~~~~~~~ double hard*

so am back to the past. ha ha ha

biggest fear

>> doing nothing except typing

Dear uncle ~

my biggest fear : speaking  english in public

in my family, we didn't develop speaking skill

i mean in english 

even in school also, i didn't talk in eng

so when you are in uni stage

of course you'll need to speak in english

i can talk in eng

but i cant speak directly on the spot because i need to think first

i can't talk without thinking first

i envy to those people who can talk freely without think much

i really do !

idk how to get rid of this fear

because when i REALLY get nervous

everything  in my mind totally get blank. na-da, nothing

im hopeless *sigh*

birthday

>> tngah makan ! yey ! LOL

Dear Uncle

since hari ni 19hb

genap sebulan since birthday aku,

hari tu tak cakap jadi apa hari tu (nak jugak cerita. tak kira ! LOL)

tak sangka budak2 ni ingat birthday aku

dorang buat suprise even tak ada la kek yang besar2 pon

tapi terharu dengan effort dorang keluar town untuk membeli semua tu

membuatku tergaru. ngeeee

HADIAH =D

oke dorang bagi coklat

tau dah aku ni hantu coklat

bagi lagi coklat

TERIMA KASIH kamu2 semua

moga Allah membalas jasa2 kalian =)

actually aku tak fav sangt sambut birthday ni

tapi dah budak2 ni buat mcm tu

mampu tergaru sj la...kuang3

Plan

>> wasting my time-because-i-can't-sleep T______T

word for you and me =D

Dua' and tawakal. Allah will lead the ways  =)

cr to the owner

sick

>> staring at my TL without doing nothing

Hai.....

First of all... hello 2014 =)
actually..im officially ended my 1st semester for 1st year
i know..i know...still have 3 years and half.. but who care.. ha ha ha ==
so.... am here..because
naaahh...i want to confess something
you know...to further study is my first choice..
but if i didn't get it..i will find work that suitable for me
but who know, lucky is on my side. i've got offered to further study at kinda the best university in my country
the problem here is...my parents can't afford it..i know..to make it worst..my lil sister also got the offer to further her study..i've tried to turn off the offer but they forbid me to do that..and so..they go here and there to borrow some money..its not that i'm ashamed but i can turn it off, go to work and just give my lil sis go to study..as much as i want to study..i think my lil sis is my priority.
and then..i've go there..to study..no choice..
and now...my family financial is NOT stable at all..and my father has no job..he just repair some computer if someone call him and planting mushroom..even he is doing that but the income still not too much..
my family kinda big consist 8 people..and can you think with doing job like that..can do much??
idk what to do to help my parents now..now we actually kinda have NO money
and its hurt me to see my father face..i know he is in distress
i don't know what to do..and its make me wanna cry so hard..but i cant! TT________TT
every night i cant sleep..just because think how to make myself to be active,intelligence so that any company will take me..and i can help my family... =( its kinda sad to have a daughter like me.. //cry so hard//